nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
