everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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