So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
