i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Boobs are out for the taking
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Randomize
