i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
