I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
