I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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