When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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