I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
if only i could text you this smell
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
