I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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