My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
He shit in the fireplace
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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