I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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