The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Randomize
