he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize