Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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