Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
smell my finger.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
