Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
