Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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