What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
