My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
