That's intense
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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