Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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