I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
