In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
