I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
