To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
He did a backflip because drugs
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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