sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Drunk is not a location!
Randomize
