he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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