it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
