Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
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