Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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