i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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