He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Randomize
