how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
