They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
