She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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