How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
