what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
