CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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