And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
