hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
