Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
