i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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