guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize