When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
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