he looks like a really good dad on facebook
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize