Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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