i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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