If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
