Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I should be sponsored by Trojan
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Randomize
