I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
